Monday, March 30, 2009

Synopsis of The Edge

Anthony Hopkins Character seems to remember everything that comes into his mind, he can't help it, which makes him a genius. He's also very good with money, which makes him a billionaire. Alec Baldwin Character is a razzy New York photographer who is secretly sleeping with Anthony Hopkins Character's trophy wife. There are other people, and all together they have made a short trip to the arctic to celebrate Anthony Hopkins Character's birthday and so Alec Baldwin Character can take some sexy Injun photos of Anthony Hopkins Character's Julia-Roberts-hot wife. Alec Baldwin Character seeks a subtle opportunity to shame Anthony Hopkins Character by surprising him excessively in a bear costume in front of everybody. Anthony Hopkins Character falls down. The next morning, Alec Baldwin Character is behaving like an important artist and demands to fly north so he can take a picture of a pig-tailed native man named Gus or Gert. His assistant is a soft black man. Anthony Hopkins Character and Alec Baldwin Character are having repartee in the plane; he turns to him and says, "So how do you plan on murdering me?" At that moment, they run into a flock of birds. One of the birds smashes through the window, another gets mangled in the propellor and splatters them with blood. The plane goes out of control, hits a mountain, and flops into a lake. Alec Baldwin Character saves himself, while Anthony Hopkins Character maintains his presence of mind enough to rescue the flares and the assistant, but the pilot is dead. On shore, they use a flare to start a fire. They warm up and begin having explosive, confrontational interactions. Anthony Hopkins Character explains to them that most people who die in the wilderness die of shame. He utilizes his genius to make a compass, but his belt buckle throws it off, and fifteen minutes later they've walked for a day and end up in the same place. In the mean time, a bear has chased them and Anthony Hopkins character loses the bag with the flares. Anthony Hopkins Character is ashamed. Alec Baldwin Character smokes a cigarette by the lake and laughs loudly-yet-inwardly at Anthony Hopkins Character. Then the bear eats the assistant. The two run away, but the bear is hunting them. After several days, Anthony Hopkins Character says, "I'm going to kill the mother-fucker." They make spears and goad the bear into a stream, where Anthony Hopkins Character uses the weight of the bear to puncture him. He sighs. He has always wanted to do something unequivocal. They make bear-fur costumes. They walk in the snow. They come across a cabin with a canoe and a map and whiskey and a gun. Anthony Hopkins Character discovers that Alec Baldwin Character has been sleeping with his wife. Alec Baldwin Character decides to kill Anthony Hopkins Character. He leads him outside at gunpoint, but Anthony Hopkins Character tricks him into stepping into a hidden pit that serves as a bear-trap. Alec Baldwin Character has a big stick through his leg. Even though he has tried to kill him, Anthony Hopkins Character wants to rescue Alec Baldwin Character. He loads him into a canoe and paddles down river to civilization. They stop at the edge of a lake. A helicopter appears, but at that moment Alec Baldwin Character dies. At the end, reporters want to know how everyone died. Anthony Hopkins Character is emotional. He says, "They died saving my life."

1 Comments:

Blogger Ken Hedges said...

Mark Mann. Kenny Hedges. This is adorable.

August 5, 2010 at 12:19 PM  

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